Nearing the End of the Shortest and Toughest Month

Tomorrow is February 28. We've had a particularly long, cold, and snowy winter this year. Based on the height of the snow drifts, I don't imagine all of the snow will melt away before April. That's okay. It will be March on Sunday! It's still cold, but the sun is shining, and with the time change making sunset an hour later next weekend, it will be easier to believe that spring will really come again.

We won't be sitting on these benches for a while!

In my circle of homeschooling friends, the longstanding advice is to "avoid making any important decisions in February" if at all possible. I believe that our brains need warmth and sunshine, and perhaps a week or two of Lent, for the clarity required for good decision-making. In February, we are more than half-way through the school year, and more-than-half-ready to throw in the towel on days where it seems that sending the kids to school may be the better choice for everyone's sanity (except for the school teachers who already have enough work to do without adding a new student mid-year).

Well, to all you homeschoolers out there, we made it! February is almost over. I have to admit that I did not make it through the whole month without losing my patience on more than one occasion.

Physical education and home maintenance classes=shoveling the driveway, again and again.

I have been struggling with several things lately, none of them life-threatening or anything, just "stuff." I felt down, but I didn't know why. I stopped doing things I used to enjoy immensely, and again, I wasn't sure why. It was not to the point of medical depression, but it seemed to be heading in that direction. Part of the problem, I know, is the cold. I really don't enjoy winter. I know many people truly suffer in the cold and the snow--the homeless, those who cannot afford the high cost of heating bills, the elderly and disabled individuals whose travel is seriously impeded by poorly cleared walks and parking lots. I feel guilty about complaining when I think of others who are truly suffering. 

The twigs behind the mailbox are the top of a mostly-buried crabapple tree.

What can I do instead of complaining and becoming impatient? As a Christmas gift to the parish, every family at our church was offered a copy of Matthew Kelly's Rediscover Catholicism. One phrase that Kelly repeats throughout the book has made a deep impression on me in the past month: "Our lives change when our habits change." I realize that I have little control over the road conditions or air temperature. What I can control, however, are my habits.

One bad habit I recognized in my life was procrastination, a.k.a. work avoidance. I would find many interesting or seemingly important things to keep me from grading papers or prepping lessons. Then, I'd wonder why my children weren't mastering math concepts. As Kelly says, "Our lives change when our habits change," and I realized this month that I have some changing to do. To begin, I have been pulling myself away from the internet and getting things done. I've done a better job meal planning this month--and I kept the budget under $500 for the first time in a long time, and we ate quite well. (Last month I spent about $700 on groceries.)

I realize I can't attempt to change too much at once, or I will be destined to fail and to quit trying. I have been working on simple and attainable goals. For instance, I focused on staying within my grocery budget, and it worked.

The second change this month is two-fold. Instead of wasting time searching for recipes and decorating ideas online, I've been reading books (like Rediscover Catholicism) and getting work done for our homeschool and for my outside teaching job.

I'm still working on better time management and will continue to work on the meal planning/budget stuff. For March, though, I have some other habits I plan to change. I know that if I say it here, it will motivate me, just like the food budget post motivated me this month.

I'm not a patient person. There, I said it. I keep wondering what I need to do to become more patient. I know, I know: "Pray for patience." I get that part, but Rediscovering Catholicism and Three Moments of the Day: Praying with the Heart of Jesus by Christopher S. Collins, S.J. (the book my women's Bible study is currently reading) have helped me recognize that I have all the tools I need. I just need to use the tools. Kelly's chapter about the rosary reminded me that when I was regularly praying the rosary and running, I was more peaceful. Fr. Collins reminds us that God sees us as his "beloved sons and daughters with whom he is well pleased" even when we aren't all that lovable. I can't sit around complaining that I'm impatient, thinking that I'm a lost cause. God knows what I need. If my heart is open and ready to receive his grace, I will find the peace and patience I desire.

So, by March 31, my hope is to report the following: Lent is going great and I'm ready for Holy Week, I've coninued with the spirtual reading, I'm staying in budget for groceries, and the Rosary Runner is back to work.

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for the many blessings in my life--my family, my friends, my students. 

You meet all of my needs. Without you, I am nothing. 

With you, I have everything.

You are all-good, all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving.

Help me to know your love and show your love.

Bless all who read this prayer. You know their hearts and their needs. 

Help them to have the grace to seek you in their lives.

In this Holy Season of Lent, help us to recognize the greatest gift,  

your Son and Our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Amen.

How I Feed a Family of Five or Six on $700 (way too much) per Month

Buy fancy food ingredients that I saw on the eating healthy blog. Put said ingredients in the pantry. Look at them every few weeks and think about how I should use them some time.

Go to the store twice a week when I forget important items (read: bread).

Spoil children with potato chips, marshmallow cereal, and frozen waffles. Wonder why they won't eat fruit and salad without nagging.

Buy lots of produce, especially blueberries from Chili because...I. Need. Summer. Now. Hope that someone other than me and youngest child will eat some of the berries because they are a "super food." Then secretly hope nobody else will touch our precious blueberries.

Buy some more produce, especially salad and soup ingredients. I'm the only person in the house who likes soup (college boy likes soup, but he's in college eating their food). 

Buy frozen fruit for "yummy" smoothies that nobody except me likes. Cry inside because I just want to help them be healthy. Why don't they like ginger in their smoothies?

Realize that I won't really bake bread this week, even though I have 70 lbs. of oats and at least 18 lbs. of flour on hand. Buy some bread. Feel guilty for not baking bread, then throw some grinder rolls in the cart. Dinner will be meatball subs to use up the meatballs I made from the grass-fed organic beef I bought last week.

Buy more grass-fed organic beef. 

Buy capers, Kalamata olives, chia seeds, and hemp seeds.

Buy sesame seeds to make tahini in my fancy new blender. Think about making it for a month. Maybe I'll do that tomorrow.

Buy hazelnuts to make hazelnut spread. Watch 10 videos about how to shell them. Think about shelling them for a month. Maybe I'll shell and roast those tomorrow, too.

Buy bags of dried beans. Actually cook the beans in the slow cooker and realize they are delicious, particularly in comparison to canned beans.

Save money by making my own slow-cooker yogurt and granola.

This week, I read a few blogs about families who spend less than $250 per month on groceries. How??? Well, they raise chickens, which is huge! I cannot raise chickens--not allowed in the city. They have successful gardens and put back food. They shop at Aldi. I do that! They meal plan. I do that sometimes. 

There's the problem! I probably cannot realistically get to a $250 per month goal in the winter time in New England, but I can do better than $700. 

I meal-planned for next week based on my pantry inventory. I will be working in some of those fancy food ingredients from the pantry. February starts in a couple days. Let's see how much under $700 I can get the grocery budget!

Heavenly Father,

You've blessed us abundantly. Thank you for your many blessings. Help me to make better use of the resources of food and money. Help me to nourish my family and friends with good foods. Help me to use financial resources to your glory, Lord. 

Amen.

Garage Project, Part One

When we bought our house back in 2005, we knew we would need to do some updating. We've done a little at a time, including a new roof and new doors, new faucets, lots of painting, a new garage door, and updating to the downstairs bathroom. We have a list of other updates we'd still like to make when they are in the budget. One of the worst spots in the house is the attached garage. It's "just a garage" so it was pretty been low on the priority list. Over the years, we have used the space for storing bikes, lawn and garden tools, and the van. I've also used it as a workshop for furniture and kitchen cabinet painting projects. My favorite use of the space is for practicing Irish Dance! Before our annual recital, sometimes alone and other years with my daughter or my friend, the van gets moved out and the floor swept, and then I practice my hard shoe dances. 

We are not planning to move any time in the foreseeable future, but since this is our third house, I've learned to remodel and update in terms of improving home value and sale-ability. An ugly garage space probably wouldn't be the main feature that would tank a home sale, but a fresh-looking garage could definitely be appealing to a buyer. The other thing I've learned after selling two homes is that it's smart to make the improvements for yourself, not for the next owner. I lived with dingy, ugly wall-to-wall carpet for several years at our previous house. I shampooed it, and it still looked bad. When we listed the house to sell, the realtor strongly suggested replacing the carpeting. I agreed, and the house looked so much better--for the next owner. This time, we're making the changes to make our home the way we like it.

House wall. See ugly paneling piece around the garage
door opener. The whole wall to the right of the house door
was pieced like that.

In spite of its usefulness, the interior of our garage is downright ugly. The wall attached to the house had some 1970s fake wood paneling, which would have been okay with a coat of paint, if the pieces weren't all smaller than 3' x 3'. They were oddly pieced in, and it looked super tacky. The lighting is poor and the windows are difficult to open, so it's stuffy in the middle of summer. In addition to the weird wall treatments, the sheet rock on the ceiling was taped and mudded, but never painted. As a result, the tape seams have cracked. Before his summer job started, my oldest son removed the fake wood paneling, revealing drywall like the ceiling and the other half of the house wall. The other walls are plywood. 

Attic access ladder is broken and tape seams are cracked.

My husband and I agreed last month that it's time to make some changes to the garage. Most of them are not expensive--just time consuming. We've already purged a lot of junk during June when I played the Minimalism Game, but then we had a couple weeks of not much progress. As any runner knows, having a race to train for is a great motivator. I am training for a half marathon 10 weeks from now. I started a couple months ago, and I'm starting to build up my mileage so that when race day rolls around, I'll be ready. A household project is easy to ignore and postpone, unless specific deadlines require accountability. The Minimalism Game helped because I knew we needed to purge 20+ items per day at the end of the month. Now that the game is over, it has been easy to focus on other things and ignore the garage. 

Enter...organized and hard-working husband. I had lots of other things I would have rather done last weekend, but my husband said he was planning to work on the garage. It wasn't necessarily the most romantic way to spend our anniversary, but we were working together, and that's a big motivator for me. If I have a partner and accountability, I have all the focus of a "normal" non-ADD person. I jumped into full-on work mode. We used the spackling compound we had on hand and finished patching and sanding the wall that had had the fake wood paneling. It's now nice and smooth and ready for priming and painting. Unfortunately, we ran out of supplies (we were using up what we had from other projects). So far, this project has cost "zero dollars"!

Tune in tomorrow for an update on this weekend's progress and the benefits of accountability!

We Can't Afford That

My husband and I are both frugal about most things. At times, I will mention various improvements that would be nice to make around the house or things I might like. Other times, he mentions bike or running gear that he would enjoy. We've both frequently responded to these dream purchases with the stock answer: "We can't afford that."

Around tax season this year, I started to reflect on whether we could "afford that"--whatever "that" may be. I realized that since my husband starting paying the bills 10 years ago, I haven't had the intimate awareness of our funds that I had early in our marriage--the awareness that enabled us to have a buffer in savings and to pay a vehicle off early. Sure, I'd look at the reports in Microsoft Money and see the income/expense comparisons, but it didn't mean much to me. I'd go shopping and blindly swipe the credit card, confident that we could pay the balance each month, but not really considering the future or our savings goals. We've had the van for 14 years. At some point it will need replacing, and I don't want a 5-year car loan!

I offered to relieve him of the money management duties earlier this year, not because I could do a better job than he could with paying bills, but because I could do a better job with my spending if I was more aware of our finances. After paying the bills and recording in Microsoft Money for a couple months, I wondered if there was a better system. We have attempted to use the Money budgeting tool for years, but it is cumbersome and doesn't give me the control and focus I was hoping to find in financial software. I couldn't easily change the dollars in a category to reflect the month-to-month changes in life. My husband has told me for years that budgets don't work. He's an accountant, and is 3/4 through the testing for the CPA, so he knows more about business and finance than I do. Although I didn't want to believe budgets couldn't work, it seemed he was right. 

Four rules for YNAB Method.
Image credit: http://www.youneedabudget.com/

I wasn't ready to give up, though. Like any modern thinker, I started searching the internet for answers. How could I better manage our funds so we could "afford that" if we really needed it? My search brought me to "You Need a Budget (YNAB)." YNAB is a method of money management that helped me recognize the problem wasn't with budgeting. The problem was with forecasting--planning a whole year's worth of spending before the dollars ever hit the bank accounts. If you look at the four rules of YNAB, you'll see that the first rule is to give every dollar a job. What does that mean? Simply, the money you have gets assigned to a budget category. No forecasting here. You take the money on hand, you look at your monthly expenses, and you start assigning the money to categories. 

The first thing I realized about YNAB was that it seemed friendly. I know, that sounds like a dorky reason to pick a budgeting software program, but stick with me here. YNAB offers a 34-day full-featured demo of the program so you can work through a full month's worth of bill paying and learn to use the software before making a financial commitment. YNAB also offers free online live classes, discussion forums, and personal support. I have taken several of the webinar classes, and each instructor was personable, knowledgeable, and helpful. With each webinar, I learned new skills to use for our budget.

The second thing I realized about YNAB was that it works the way I thought a budget should work. Forecasting is frustrating because there is no "typical month." Every month has an emergency or a surprise expense. Rules two, three, and four help us to plan, adapt, and adjust for those surprises so that we can "roll with the punches" and make informed decisions about our spending. 

YNAB utilizes the Cloud, so if you share accounts, each computer and smart phone for your household can share a single license. You can add spending instantly and check category balances before making a purchase, and every device will have up-to-date information. That also means that when my 5-year-old netbook dies, I won't have to worry that I've lost all of my budgeting history like we did when the old computer died with our only backup of Money 7 or 8 years ago.

Click here to purchase YNAB with 10% discount.

My experience with YNAB began with reading through the website and downloading the software. I started setting up accounts and categories for a day or so, and then participated in my first webinar. I didn't realize until the class started that for each class, YNAB gives a free license to one participant. I never won a license, even though I took four webinars. However, by the fourth webinar, and the 30th day of my trial period, I had budgeted for the purchase of the software! 

Since I found the software through another blogger's website, I realized I could get a 10% discount if I used her code to purchase the software. She, in turn could earn $6 for the referral. Since I purchased the software, I now have a referral code which can save you 10% on YNAB! If you are new to my blog, please bookmark this article and then download the YNAB trial. If you don't win a free copy through the webinars and decide to purchase, please come back and use this referral code to get your 10% discount!

I have been using YNAB for almost two months now. As I mentioned earlier, we live a frugal lifestyle, but seemed to be living paycheck to paycheck. By using YNAB, we're very close to achieving the Rule 4 ideal of living off of last month's income. The rainy day funds could be bigger and our retirement planning definitely needs more attention, but in the short term, I feel more confident about our spending. This morning, I was able to say: "You need new running shoes? Yes, we can afford that today."