Nearing the End of the Shortest and Toughest Month

Tomorrow is February 28. We've had a particularly long, cold, and snowy winter this year. Based on the height of the snow drifts, I don't imagine all of the snow will melt away before April. That's okay. It will be March on Sunday! It's still cold, but the sun is shining, and with the time change making sunset an hour later next weekend, it will be easier to believe that spring will really come again.

We won't be sitting on these benches for a while!

In my circle of homeschooling friends, the longstanding advice is to "avoid making any important decisions in February" if at all possible. I believe that our brains need warmth and sunshine, and perhaps a week or two of Lent, for the clarity required for good decision-making. In February, we are more than half-way through the school year, and more-than-half-ready to throw in the towel on days where it seems that sending the kids to school may be the better choice for everyone's sanity (except for the school teachers who already have enough work to do without adding a new student mid-year).

Well, to all you homeschoolers out there, we made it! February is almost over. I have to admit that I did not make it through the whole month without losing my patience on more than one occasion.

Physical education and home maintenance classes=shoveling the driveway, again and again.

I have been struggling with several things lately, none of them life-threatening or anything, just "stuff." I felt down, but I didn't know why. I stopped doing things I used to enjoy immensely, and again, I wasn't sure why. It was not to the point of medical depression, but it seemed to be heading in that direction. Part of the problem, I know, is the cold. I really don't enjoy winter. I know many people truly suffer in the cold and the snow--the homeless, those who cannot afford the high cost of heating bills, the elderly and disabled individuals whose travel is seriously impeded by poorly cleared walks and parking lots. I feel guilty about complaining when I think of others who are truly suffering. 

The twigs behind the mailbox are the top of a mostly-buried crabapple tree.

What can I do instead of complaining and becoming impatient? As a Christmas gift to the parish, every family at our church was offered a copy of Matthew Kelly's Rediscover Catholicism. One phrase that Kelly repeats throughout the book has made a deep impression on me in the past month: "Our lives change when our habits change." I realize that I have little control over the road conditions or air temperature. What I can control, however, are my habits.

One bad habit I recognized in my life was procrastination, a.k.a. work avoidance. I would find many interesting or seemingly important things to keep me from grading papers or prepping lessons. Then, I'd wonder why my children weren't mastering math concepts. As Kelly says, "Our lives change when our habits change," and I realized this month that I have some changing to do. To begin, I have been pulling myself away from the internet and getting things done. I've done a better job meal planning this month--and I kept the budget under $500 for the first time in a long time, and we ate quite well. (Last month I spent about $700 on groceries.)

I realize I can't attempt to change too much at once, or I will be destined to fail and to quit trying. I have been working on simple and attainable goals. For instance, I focused on staying within my grocery budget, and it worked.

The second change this month is two-fold. Instead of wasting time searching for recipes and decorating ideas online, I've been reading books (like Rediscover Catholicism) and getting work done for our homeschool and for my outside teaching job.

I'm still working on better time management and will continue to work on the meal planning/budget stuff. For March, though, I have some other habits I plan to change. I know that if I say it here, it will motivate me, just like the food budget post motivated me this month.

I'm not a patient person. There, I said it. I keep wondering what I need to do to become more patient. I know, I know: "Pray for patience." I get that part, but Rediscovering Catholicism and Three Moments of the Day: Praying with the Heart of Jesus by Christopher S. Collins, S.J. (the book my women's Bible study is currently reading) have helped me recognize that I have all the tools I need. I just need to use the tools. Kelly's chapter about the rosary reminded me that when I was regularly praying the rosary and running, I was more peaceful. Fr. Collins reminds us that God sees us as his "beloved sons and daughters with whom he is well pleased" even when we aren't all that lovable. I can't sit around complaining that I'm impatient, thinking that I'm a lost cause. God knows what I need. If my heart is open and ready to receive his grace, I will find the peace and patience I desire.

So, by March 31, my hope is to report the following: Lent is going great and I'm ready for Holy Week, I've coninued with the spirtual reading, I'm staying in budget for groceries, and the Rosary Runner is back to work.

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for the many blessings in my life--my family, my friends, my students. 

You meet all of my needs. Without you, I am nothing. 

With you, I have everything.

You are all-good, all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving.

Help me to know your love and show your love.

Bless all who read this prayer. You know their hearts and their needs. 

Help them to have the grace to seek you in their lives.

In this Holy Season of Lent, help us to recognize the greatest gift,  

your Son and Our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Amen.

Happy New Year, Happy Advent!

First of the month.  Mondays.  New school years.  New liturgical years.  All of these "beginnings" give me hope to improve upon the way I'm living.  But here it is, Wednesday morning of the first week of Advent, and I'm just getting around to reflecting upon the "Happy New Year!" greeting I offered on Thanksgiving (my birthday was last week, too, so it really is my new year right now).

When I log into this blog, I usually look to see how many viewers have visited the site and which post brought them here.  The latest view was "Struggling to Keep Your Resolutions" which was a link to another blogger's post.  My most popular title is "Maybe I Have ADD," followed by "Girls and ADHD or ADD" and "Decluttering My Domestic Church."  Clearly, I am attracting readers who are like me--distracted and seeking order.  Chances are, you may feel like you are chasing your tail and not accomplishing anything.  A little reflection will probably indicate that you accomplish much more than you think you do, but you need to put it in perspective.

Yesterday, I woke up feeling very optimistic.  I had finished a big grading project for my "paying job" on Monday afternoon (I teach English part-time at a local college) and hoped to tackle my household to-do list.  When I looked at my white board in the afternoon to check items off the to-do list, I realized that I had completed lots of "invisible" tasks that weren't on the written to-do list.  I washed my bedding, dusted all the ceiling fans in the house, watered the plants, made a couple of important phone calls, printed paperwork for my eldest's college application process, finished some homeschool lessons with the boys, reduced the giant pile of Black Friday ads and other clutter on the kitchen counter, and put away the Thanksgiving decorations (all four of them). My desk was still cluttered. The carpet was still not vacuumed.  Dead plants were still residing in the front garden. Dinner was still not planned. Worst of all, we hadn't read the saint of the day on the feast of St. Francis Xavier. What kind of Catholic homeschooling mom ignores the feast of St. Francis Xavier?  I had a plan, but somehow forgot about it while I watered the plants 6 hours earlier and let the boys sleep late. I bounced from task to task without a clear focus, and several priorities were neglected. It would be dark in less than an hour, so outside work was probably not going to happen.

The children heartily suggested I go clothing shopping with my daughter and then buy pizza for dinner.  The thought was tempting, but I was in frumpy gardening clothes because I had intended to work outside and in the garage since the weather was mild.  A trip to the mall was out of the question, and ordering pizza was not in the budget or plan.

The plan!  I remembered that I had a plan.  I had made a menu for November and December with my friend a few weeks ago. Life is much easier with a menu. I have stuck to the menu for a few weeks, and my days have gone smoothly.  The grading project had consumed four straight days, though, and I hadn't looked at the December meal plan when I went to the store last week. For Tuesday, chicken stir fry was on the menu.  Unfortunately, I didn't have chicken or stir-fry vegetables in the house. As I pondered my options, a child came to me asking for video game time.  Distracted Mama often says, "Sure, you're done with school, go ahead." Then, once they are playing, I notice their chores haven't been done.  I had a moment of clarity and remembered the leaves and clean-up that needed to happen in the garden (items on the written to-do list) and said, "First, I need help with the yard." He and his brother were willing to work for their screen time, so I showed them the plants that should be pulled out before the ground freezes.  After they went off to their task, I took care of emptying three cans of kitchen scraps into the compost and sorted through the remaining tomato harvest.  I had picked all of the green tomatoes in October, and they have been ripening on a table in the garage.  A few were rotten, but I found about 12 nicely ripened tomatoes, and from there developed my plan for dinner.

The happy sunflower in July.  Yesterday, it was brown and the seeds
had been consumed long ago by the birds.

The boys finished their task, and I granted permission for some screen time. I took the tomatoes to the kitchen, found the other ingredients, and took a look out the window.  I had just enough daylight to take care of the rest of the dead plants in the front garden that were too big for the boys.  Last summer, I planted vegetables in the front yard.  Giant "gone to seed" broccoli and dead sunflowers have adorned the front lawn for a couple months, making me cringe every time I see them.  I dragged the wheelbarrow to the front yard, yanked the overgrown beasts from the earth, piled them in the wheelbarrow and pushed them to their resting place in a new compost heap.  It took 15-30 minutes to change the appearance of my front lawn from unkempt to tidy (well, tidier--the rest of the leaves are still there).  I still had time to make dinner before my husband got home from work.

How I made an easy, but kinda fancy-sounding dinner:
Roasted Tomatoes with Salmon and Orzo
Ingredients:
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
1 med. red onion, coarsely chopped
12 ripe tomatoes, quartered
6 cremini mushrooms, thickly sliced
One can Wild Salmon
1/2-3/4 cup Parmesan Cheese
2 Frozen pesto cubes (2-4 T prepared pesto)
16 oz. Orzo pasta

First, I drizzled EVOO in a casserole dish and preheated the oven to 400.  To the casserole, I added a coarsely chopped red onion, quartered tomatoes, 6 cremini mushrooms, two "pesto cubes" from the freezer, and a can of wild-caught salmon.  The casserole went into the oven, and then I started water for the pasta.  After about 15 minutes, I gave the veggies and salmon a stir and realized the oven needed to be hotter, so I set it to 450.  When the orzo was cooked, the veggie mixture was fragrant and bubbling nicely.  I stirred the two together and added about a half cup of Parmesan cheese.  It was creamy, yummy, deliciousness!

Dinner was ready and waiting when my husband arrived!  The children and I got everything on the table, and my oldest lit the first Advent candle.  I sang "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel" (while the children groaned) and we waited for my husband to join us at the table.

After dinner, my husband and I prayed the rosary with the child who had requested video game time earlier.  While we prayed, I reflected on the day and on my family and our many blessings.  I realized that the day wasn't perfect and that the yard work could have gotten done completely, leaves and all, if we'd gone out right after lunch.  The way it turned out, though, was much more peaceful and really was good enough for the day.  I wasn't burdened with the work, and neither was anyone else.

When the younger boys went to bed, I took another look at the to-do list and realized there were two important computer items I could complete and erase before bed.

Several times throughout the day I had contemplated simply taking a nap or wasting time on Facebook (okay, I did do that), but the New Year's feeling helped motivate me to finish lots of little things.

This morning, I again woke feeling very optimistic.  I didn't think I had accomplished much yesterday, but as I wrote this post (at my cluttered desk), I realized this New Year is off to a good start.  Yes, there will be days where I don't "accomplish anything" and probably give in and buy take-out pizza. Yes, I am still easily distracted. However, priorities, menus, and a white board next to my desk all help.  And remembering it's Advent and new liturgical year give me hope.  Happy New Year, everyone.

I welcome comments to this blog! What are you doing to celebrate the "New Year"?  How does celebrating Advent help you to focus on Christ all around you?  If you struggle with ADD/ADHD or wonder if you have it, what do you do to stay on task?

Movie Review: Mary of Nazareth

Mary of Nazareth: The birth of Jesus.

Photo Credit – Photo Courtesy of Ignatius Press

Synopsis: This full-length feature film about the life of Our Lady, shot in English in high definition, was filmed in [Tunisia]. Actress Alissa Jung gives a beautiful, compelling and inspired portrayal of Mary…. Directed by acclaimed European film director Giacomo Campiotti (BAKHITA, DOCTOR ZHIVAGO, ST. GIUSEPPE MOSCATI) and written by Francesco Arlanch (RESTLESS HEART, PIUS XII, POPE JOHN PAUL II), in addition to the luminous performance by Jung, the film provides inspiring portrayals of all the main roles, including Andreas Pietschmann as Jesus, Luca Marinelli as Joseph, Paz Vega as Mary Magdalene and Antonia Liskova as Herodias. The original music score was written by Guy Farley. (Carmel Communications for Ignatius Press). Watch trailer here.

Who is My Mother?

From the cross, Jesus gave Mary to us as our mother. Mary, the mother of our Lord, has appeared to the faithful over the centuries, consoling and instructing us. She knows us and loves us as our tender mother. But do we know her? We encounter Mary through her brief appearances in the scriptures, through the stories of saints who experienced visions of her, and especially through recitation of the rosary. St. Juan Diego left us his tilma with her image. St. Bernadette and the children of Fatima gave us her messages to repent and to pray the rosary. And yet, “Mary is a mystery,” as the character of her father Joachim says in the new Ignatius Press release of the motion picture Mary of Nazareth. 

Just as the prayer of the rosary reflects on the mysteries of the life of Jesus and his mother, Mary, Mary of Nazareth illuminates those mysteries in the medium of film as I’ve never encountered in other portrayals of the Blessed Mother. This artistic representation of Mary has been hailed by movie critics and Marian experts alike. As I watched the film, my love and admiration for both Mary and Joseph grew deeper, and I got to know my heavenly mother. 

Ordinary Things

In Mary of Nazareth, Mary’s mystery shines in the ordinary. Just before Joseph’s marriage proposal, she sits on a rock in a garden with the sheep. The Angel Gabriel arrives while Mary is making bread.  Jesus and the twelve arrive while Mary picks carrots. Again, Mary is making bread as Jesus instructs his apostles to be salt and light. 

As Mary (Jung) does these ordinary things throughout the film, the viewer is captivated by her joy and serenity.  After she returns from assisting Elizabeth with the birth of John the Baptist, the villagers treat her with disdain for her out-of-wedlock pregnancy.  When Mary and her mother, Ann (Antonella Attili), go to pick olives, the other women leave, harrumphing and looking at her with contempt.  Another young woman in a similar situation may have gotten angry, insulted, or depressed by their harsh treatment.  Mary clearly recognizes their disgust, but she remains serene, gathering the fruit.  She knows the child she carries is not the son of man and she has committed no sin.  She trusts the Lord, who through the angel told her to “Rejoice!” and so she does.  In fact, she rarely stops smiling throughout the film, so deep is her joy.

Relationships

The original film was 200 minutes, while the Ignatius Press version is edited to 153 minutes.  As a result of the editing, some viewers may miss the connection between Mary (Jung) and Mary Magdalene (Paz Vega).  Another reviewer who viewed the full-length Maria de Nazaret explained that the two women were close friends as girls.  Mary’s path in life begins with a childhood spent in the temple, learning about the Lord. Magdalene’s path leads her to Herod’s court and a pursuit of worldly desires which nearly ends in her stoning.  The reunion of the women set against the backdrop of Jesus’ teaching the parable of the prodigal son shows the Gospel message of mercy and love in a profound, telling way.  Mary’s and Magdalene’s friendship reminds us of Mary’s humanity.

Of course, many reviewers have discussed the relationship between Mary (Jung) and Jesus (Andreas Pietschmann).  Their interaction reveals a closeness, particularly before the Last Supper, that reveals much about Our Lady’s role in salvation history.  These talented actors capture the emotion and tenderness between mother and son in each scene they share.

The relationship that most deeply touched my heart was between Mary (Jung) and Joseph (Luca Marinelli).  We hear in Matthew’s gospel that Joseph, “a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to send her away quietly” (Mt 1:19) when Mary was found to be with child “before they came together” (Mt 1:18). Joseph loves Mary.  Rather than focus on his righteousness, Joseph tells Mary the information about her pregnancy is too much. He says, “I’m just a man.” The turn of phrase here—the double meaning of “just” emphasizes his humanity.  This man chosen by God to raise his son and protect his mother cannot believe the news, but he refuses to bring harm, shame, and death to his beloved.  At the moment of his deepest grief, the angel appears in his dream, and, through the gift of God’s grace, Joseph begins to live a similar joy to that of Mary.

There Is My Mother!

You don’t want to miss a moment of this film! We know the highlights of Mary’s life—we reflect on them in the Mysteries of the Rosary.  In Mary of Nazareth, the story we know so well comes to life, in all of its tender humanity. This movie will change your life.  You will have a new appreciation for the joys and sorrows of Our Lady—you will get to know your mother.

Evangelization Tool

Currently, Ignatius Press is offering Mary of Nazareth through sponsored screenings.  The San Damiano Youth Group from the Basilica of St. Stanislaus in Chicopee, Massachusetts, will be hosting a screening at 7:30 p.m. on January 18, 2014.  Tickets are $10 and the fundraiser will help defray the costs of the group’s annual summer camp and retreat.  The San Damiano Youth Group hosted Restless Heart: The Confessions of St. Augustine last January as a Year of Faith movie event and is excited to share this latest Ignatius Press release with the Diocese of Springfield.  

Rosary Runner

“Running for Their Lives” (Columbia Magazine, December 2012), chronicles the founding and purpose of LIFE Runners, the largest international running group dedicated to Pro-Life causes.  The founders of the group are both members of the Knights of Columbus and Lt. Colonels in the United States Air Force. They began praying together as they were training for “Pikes Peak Ascent—dubbed ‘America’s Ultimate Challenge’—in 2006.” Out of that experience grew a daily devotional email that evolved into the LIFE Runners group which now has members across the United States and internationally.

I have enjoyed running since I was in college, but have begun more seriously training for races over the past four years.  My first official race was a local 5K trail race in a weekly summer series.  I wanted to quit for the last half-mile, but my best friend ran the race with me and encouraged me to repeat, “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”  I finished in last place, but I finished.  That moment transformed me.  My runs became opportunities for intercessory prayer. 

Since that first race, I have completed many shorter races as well as three half marathons (13.1 miles) and one 25K (15.5 miles) half-ultra trail race. Prayer has become a central focus for my training runs. In May of 2011, I was training for the Memorial Day Half Marathon in the Berkshires.  I had begun praying the rosary during my long training runs, and I regularly asked friends for intentions I could offer on the road.  One dear friend was 8 months pregnant and having complications requiring bed rest.  Our mutual friend called to tell me to pray for her, but I didn’t realize then that her situation was critical. She had been to the doctor on Friday of Mother’s Day weekend, and was expecting to go for her regular follow up the following Wednesday.

On Sunday, the doctor called to tell her she had been thinking of my friend all day and had decided to look more deeply at her history and charts. She was uncomfortable with waiting until Wednesday for the follow-up and wanted her to come to the hospital that day. She ultimately had a scheduled emergency C-section.  Her tiny baby arrived several weeks early and had Down syndrome.  Because my friend is unfalteringly Pro-Life, she had declined all prenatal testing that would have indicated any genetic concerns. She did not know the baby had Down syndrome until she was born.  The decision to go to the hospital and not wait until the Wednesday doctor’s appointment saved both of their lives. A few weeks later when I saw Baby Brigid for the first time, she was so tiny that she fit in a doll’s cradle.  Her perfect porcelain skin looked like a doll’s!  I just kept looking at this beautiful baby with total love and awe in God’s creation.  Later, my friend told me that my prayers helped save their lives that day.  I sobbed.  I know God had taken care of her and her tiny baby, but the challenges had just begun.  As with many babies with Down Syndrome, Baby Brigid would need open heart surgery to repair holes in her heart.

The following autumn, when I was training for the 25K, I began consistently praying a full rosary with all four mysteries on my long weekend runs.  Even though I’d sometimes lose count and say a 15-Hail Mary “decade”, the meditation on the life of Christ and my focus on the needs of those whose prayer intentions I carried made the runs more purposeful, if not easier.  I traveled out of state for the race, and Baby Brigid, now 4 months old, would be having her surgery in Boston while I was gone.  I offered the 3½ grueling hours of that race for Baby Brigid, the family, the surgeons, and all who would care for her during her recovery.  The race was a very technical trail race with lots of rocks, roots, and climbing.  I was not well-prepared for trails as I generally train and race on paved roads.  When I was a little more than half-way through the course, praying the sorrowful mysteries, my foot got caught under a root, and I tripped and fell hard.  I lay face down in the dirt for a long moment while other runners skirted around me. I pushed myself up and checked for blood and broken bones. My big toe throbbed and I had scraped hands and knees, but I was able to continue.  I thought of Christ falling three times on the Road to Calvary.  I said, “Lord, please take my fall, my pain, and keep Baby Brigid safe.  Please let me suffer so she can heal faster.”

If I didn’t have Baby Brigid to run for, I may have been tempted to quit and call my husband to come pick me up at the next water stop.  Carrying the prayer intention gave strength and purpose to my run.  I finished with no other falls, though I had to walk and hike a lot more than I had anticipated. The 25K was by no means my fastest race, but it was definitely my most purposeful and important.  When I got home, I found out that Baby Brigid’s was a success.  My friend said, “I knew you were praying for us in Boston. Looking around the room at the other parents waiting for kids in surgery, we were the only calm ones in the room. I was even surprised myself at how much I was able to trust God to guide the surgeon's hands. The surgery was perfect—it couldn't have been better even though the hole was larger than they thought and there were 3 not 2. They even sent us home a day earlier than [what they] originally said was minimum because she was doing so great. The whole thing was a tremendously difficult experience and I know I would have been a puddle if it hadn't have been for you and all my prayer warriors.”

After those two experiences, I have continued to ask for prayer intentions and to pray the rosary on my solitary runs.  The LIFE Runners article helped me recognize a bigger opportunity.  My prayers had been offered to help one precious baby.  Perhaps uniting my prayers with those of a running team could help save many babies!  I am working with two friends to establish the first Massachusetts chapter of Life Runners. We need 5 runners and a chaplain to be “official,” but in the meantime the three of us have been training since April for the Surftown Half Marathon in Rhode Island on September 15, the traditional feast of Our Lady of Sorrows.  We will race in our LIFE Runners t-shirts which say “Remember the Unborn” and include the reference to Jeremiah 1:5.  The scripture reads “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you.” On September 15, we will run for Pro-Life, witnessing to the Truth that all human life is sacred.

In addition to uniting in prayer, LIFE Runners strive to raise money for Pro-Life causes.  The suggested goal is $262 per year which represents the 26.2 miles of a marathon.  Personally, I have trained for about 260 miles so far this year, so that goal would be approximately $1 per training mile! My personal goal is $524 ($40 per mile for my race on September 15)--$262 each for one local and one national charity. 

I have selected the Springfield Pregnancy Care Center as the local beneficiary of my fundraising efforts.  The SPCC has been helping women and children in the Springfield area since 1985.  Their services include the following: free pregnancy testing; confidential counseling; abstinence and STD education; referrals to medical, community and government agencies; free maternity clothes, baby clothes and baby equipment; ongoing personal support; adoption information; prenatal and postnatal instruction; and post abortion support.  The Massachusetts Citizens for Life chose SPCC to receive their 2013 Pro-Life Group of the Year Award. 

In addition to the local charity I'm supporting, LIFE Runners fund raise for one of three national organizations the group selects each year. The national beneficiary I've chosen of the three is the Vitae Foundation which promotes the message of life through the media. By promoting hope and the value of life in the media, we can help change hearts and save lives! You may make a donation to my Vitae Foundation Fundraiser, by clicking here: "Sharing the message of LIFE!"

Will you help me meet my goal of $262 for each charity by October 6?

Please consider a tax-deductible donation to support my efforts to help the Springfield Pregnancy Care Center or the Vitae Foundation to continue offering services to women facing unplanned pregnancies.  Your gift will help save a baby. Thank you for your support!