Maybe I Have A.D.D.

A year or two ago, I called my mom to ask her if she thought I had A.D.D.  She laughed at me and said, "No."  She thinks I just have too many things going on--four children, two cats, husband, job, garden, etc.  However, I get the impression that her idea of Attention Deficit Disorder includes the Hyperactive trait.  I may not be a severe case, but I am very easily distracted and have a hard time keeping my attention focused on brain work, like grading papers.  I tell everyone I love my job, and it's true; however, grading essays makes me sleepy.  Physical work is a different story.  I could pull weeds or cook for 8 hours straight as long as I had water and snacks to keep my energy up, but give me a batch of essays to grade and it's like a sleeping pill! The papers are good papers--quite interesting, actually. The problem is me.   


I need projects to keep me motivated.  If I don't have a project, I seem to flounder.  Last year I painted the kitchen cabinets.  I was motivated and driven to complete the project.  I had something physical to show for it when I was done.  For some reason, paid mental work doesn't motivate me to keep working with the same gusto.


I have had more alone hours than usual this week because the kids are at a summer day program at the Church from 9-2.  My plan was to get caught up with grading and prepare for my fall course.  I have done a good bit of grading, but I'm still not caught up.  I have communicated with the bookstore and the book rep. about the text I plan to use this fall, but I haven't written assignments or read the text.  I have done things that were part of the plan for the week, but not as much as I'd hoped to have done by today.  The quiet house mainly reminded me how easily I am distracted.  When I started reading an essay, it would make me think of something else, so I'd do a quick search on that topic.  That's the problem.  I think about too many things, and Google is always ready to help.  


So far today, I've done the following: dropped the kids off at the church, baked a chocolate zucchini cake, went to Mass, baked bread (three part process from scratch), washed a load of laundry, hung it outside to dry,  read some job postings, started a batch of yogurt, washed the dishes, folded and put the laundry away, called the orthodontist, frosted the cake, graded 4 or 5 essays, talked to the bookstore, checked email, and ate lunch plus two handfuls of chocolate chips (because they're good for me!), then met the kids at our friends' house and brought their suits so they could swim.  We got home about 4:15.  I feel like I've accomplished nothing today because I still have 11 essays to grade.  What's the answer?  I know I did a lot today, but those essays are hanging over my neck like the blade of the guillotine.    And now I'm writing a blog post....    


I don't want to be sarcastic or crabby or whiny.  I just want to be done with those essays--but I need to go for a 5-mile run because it's on the training schedule! Maybe after the run and dinner and a nice iced coffee this evening, I will have the sweet clarity and focus to get the grading done so tomorrow can be a day of planning for the fall course.