One of my repeat offenses is "being critical of others." Mind you, I do not "judge" people, which really means that I "condemn them to hell." I know I'm not God and have no authority over another person's soul. However, I'm quick to think, and often enough speak, about what someone else should do to make his or her life better. I think things like, "Why doesn't he see that his decisions about X are the cause of his problems?" Or, "Why can't she just do things this way--then she would feel better, be happy, etc.?" My personality is such that I want to fix things, even if they aren't mine to fix. As a result, my mind races with solutions to all sorts of things that might not really be problems.
As I get older, I'm less critical than I used to be, but often enough I look at situations from my limited view and think I know better than the person in the situation. A friend of mine often says, "I don't live in her house" when someone is being criticized and gossip begins. This phrase is a good reminder to me of two things, not to gossip and not to be so quick to believe I have all the answers. I don't know the whole story of what goes on in that person's life.
How many people live in abusive relationships that are hidden? How many people battle with depression? How many people struggle with addictions? How many people are caring for sick loved one? We can be quick to anger or criticism when someone offends us or seems foolish, but the big picture would likely change our tune. The truth is, the only one who really knows the weight of the crosses we bear is the Lord. He took the weight of all those crosses up Calvary's Hill and stretched out his arms to save us all.
My first two weeks of Lent have included some little sacrifices and a little more prayer, as well as one visit to confession. My family usually makes it to Stations of the Cross most weeks, but we didn't make it the first two weeks of Lent. Honestly, without Stations, it doesn't really feel like Lent. We are planning to go this Friday, which will be a good reminder of Christ's sacrifice as we journey toward Easter.
Rather than focus on what others should do, I will strive this Lent to focus on how I can be a better Christian and witness to the Lord with my life. Instead of criticizing, I must pray for my brothers and sisters to allow God to work in their lives, in his time, not in mine.
And if you be unwilling to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods of your fathers, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. Joshua 24:15, RSV Catholic Edition
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