Have you ever considered writing a novel? Do the dark days of November seem like to perfect time to sip tea and write 1,667 words a day to meet a 50,000-word goal by November 30? Are you looking for a new goal or project in the midst of your already busy life that will elicit the remarks, "You're nuts!" "I don't know how you do it!" or "You're writing a novel. Wow, I've always wanted to write a novel!"? If so, you should check out the National Novel Writing Month website at NaNoWriMo.org.
I started a novel in 2010, but grading the research paper assignment I had my college students working on got in my way. Last year, my excuse was a 5-day power outage, and the research paper.
This year, the research paper is due earlier in the month! The worst of the Superstorm Sandy missed our area, so power is normal. I haven't settled on a genre or written any character sketches this time. However, I am hopeful that 2012 will be the year I write my first novel!
I proudly watched my daughter write every day and "win" as she completed her word-count goal in 2010 and 2011 (co-authored with her best friend). At age 13, she is giddy for November 1 and the chance to write her third novel.
If you have been reading my blog posts, you may be snickering a bit and thinking this is part of my A.D.O.S. and I won't finish. You may be correct in that assumption, but I'm telling you about my goal as self-motivation to stick with it.
If you decide to write a novel in November, I wish you love and sweet success, to the tune of 50,000 words.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Monday, October 29, 2012
A.D.D., A.D.O.S., or Life in the Internet Age?
When I started this little blog, I hoped it would motivate me to get my laundry room organized and eliminate clutter in my domestic church. The thought of taking pictures of my newly organized space and sharing successes in the hopes of helping other distracted moms inspired me. We had succeeded in painting just one short wall and organizing a few sections of the laundry room when the temporary lull in our family schedule disappeared. I haven't been able to finish anything else in that space since school started.
Last Friday, I finally moved the clutter out of the "family room" section of the basement and back into the laundry room since I know I won't be painting any other walls before Christmas. Back to square one! The section of the room that was destined to be a workout area is again full of boxes of clothing and art supplies that I haven't used in three years.
Which begs the question: Why can't I just finish the job? My blog post that has gotten the most traffic is "Maybe I have A.D.D," so I recognize that many of you must have similar struggles. Is it A.D.D. or something else? I know I have difficulty staying on task when I'm online. If I am grading student essays, I am often curious about ideas in their papers which prompt me to do a "quick" search. Next thing I know, I've checked two or three sites that are related to the essay. Then I notice that I have received a new email and take a moment to read the message. Next thing I know, I've spent 45 minutes to do a 15 minute task.
The problem isn't isolated to internet usage. My parents and grandma came to visit for my son's confirmation this past weekend. I was spinning in circles for days before they arrived. My timer helped me stay focused enough to keep the laundry up-to-date. However, everything else I did was interrupted by my own racing mind. Shaking the rugs from the bathroom would remind me to scrub the trash baskets which in turn would remind me that the wall in the kitchen had cobwebs on it. Meanwhile, I needed to make an urgent appointment at the pediatrician and buy groceries before taking one child to swimming and picking the other up from cross country. Not to mention music lessons. I chose to homeschool because we wanted to give our children a good, Catholic education, and because I wanted flexibility and family-control of our schedule. Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to give someone else control of the schedule--someone who has a better sense of time and the ability to say no.
My guess is that a lot of my readers who are finding me through a search about A.D.D. are equally scattered and busy. My friend told me about a "condition" called A.D.O.S.--Attention Deficit, Ooooooh Shiny! Those suffering A.D.O.S. are easily distracted by shiny objects or exciting things. The exciting things are my shiny objects. I often think I have time to do this little project or that fundraiser, and next thing I know I'm stressed out, behind on my work, and impatient.
Like I said, the children are involved in numerous activities which are all great for them. But driving them here, there, and everywhere leads to chaos. I long for simplicity, but thwart my own efforts by seeking out activities to fill the day.
Hurricane Sandy and the other two big storms are set to converge, which may lead to widespread power outages. Last October, our area suffered a week-long power outage. Other than being a bit chilly because our forced-air gas furnace relies on electricity, the week was great! We read books, spent time together, and didn't have to go anywhere for days. My A.D.D. or A.D.O.S. was gone for the week! I had clarity and focus, and the house stayed pretty clean. I honestly don't want the power to go out today, but I'm glad the outside activities are already cancelled. We'll "do school" this morning and maybe some baking as long as the power is on, and then just be together the rest of the day--sweetness !
Last Friday, I finally moved the clutter out of the "family room" section of the basement and back into the laundry room since I know I won't be painting any other walls before Christmas. Back to square one! The section of the room that was destined to be a workout area is again full of boxes of clothing and art supplies that I haven't used in three years.
Which begs the question: Why can't I just finish the job? My blog post that has gotten the most traffic is "Maybe I have A.D.D," so I recognize that many of you must have similar struggles. Is it A.D.D. or something else? I know I have difficulty staying on task when I'm online. If I am grading student essays, I am often curious about ideas in their papers which prompt me to do a "quick" search. Next thing I know, I've checked two or three sites that are related to the essay. Then I notice that I have received a new email and take a moment to read the message. Next thing I know, I've spent 45 minutes to do a 15 minute task.
The problem isn't isolated to internet usage. My parents and grandma came to visit for my son's confirmation this past weekend. I was spinning in circles for days before they arrived. My timer helped me stay focused enough to keep the laundry up-to-date. However, everything else I did was interrupted by my own racing mind. Shaking the rugs from the bathroom would remind me to scrub the trash baskets which in turn would remind me that the wall in the kitchen had cobwebs on it. Meanwhile, I needed to make an urgent appointment at the pediatrician and buy groceries before taking one child to swimming and picking the other up from cross country. Not to mention music lessons. I chose to homeschool because we wanted to give our children a good, Catholic education, and because I wanted flexibility and family-control of our schedule. Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to give someone else control of the schedule--someone who has a better sense of time and the ability to say no.
My guess is that a lot of my readers who are finding me through a search about A.D.D. are equally scattered and busy. My friend told me about a "condition" called A.D.O.S.--Attention Deficit, Ooooooh Shiny! Those suffering A.D.O.S. are easily distracted by shiny objects or exciting things. The exciting things are my shiny objects. I often think I have time to do this little project or that fundraiser, and next thing I know I'm stressed out, behind on my work, and impatient.
Like I said, the children are involved in numerous activities which are all great for them. But driving them here, there, and everywhere leads to chaos. I long for simplicity, but thwart my own efforts by seeking out activities to fill the day.
Hurricane Sandy and the other two big storms are set to converge, which may lead to widespread power outages. Last October, our area suffered a week-long power outage. Other than being a bit chilly because our forced-air gas furnace relies on electricity, the week was great! We read books, spent time together, and didn't have to go anywhere for days. My A.D.D. or A.D.O.S. was gone for the week! I had clarity and focus, and the house stayed pretty clean. I honestly don't want the power to go out today, but I'm glad the outside activities are already cancelled. We'll "do school" this morning and maybe some baking as long as the power is on, and then just be together the rest of the day--sweetness !
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Reevaluating My Expectations
I had intended to post to the blog weekly, if not daily. It's been nearly three weeks since my most recent post. Why? I don't want to use the "b" word--busy. "Busy" is just an overused excuse.
In the past few weeks, my housekeeping has been inadequate, my meal prep has been icky, and my temper...okay, this blog isn't the confessional. However, I have realized in the past few days (partly because I received the graces of the Sacrament of Reconciliation) that the expectations I have for what I can accomplish on any given day are generally unrealistic. Also, they tend to be me-driven instead of God-driven. I made a giant list on the white board this morning and assigned tasks to certain days as I prepare for my family to come visit for my eldest child's Confirmation this Saturday. The list may be a bit too ambitious, but at least I don't expect to do everything in one day.
Usually, when company is coming, I lose my mind a little bit, in the whole "SHE Perfectionism" that FlyLady talks about so often. I know, we're not supposed to use the "P" word. I want the house to look nice. I want the food to taste great. I want. I want. I want.
Some of the things I want are reasonable and good things to do in preparation for company. Others are over-the-top. Do I really need to scrub the kitchen walls and all the windows in the house this week? I'm not on vacation from work or homeschooling, so I would be taking time from my responsibilities to look good in the eyes of others. Pride.
Maybe instead of trying to make everything magazine perfect, I can make it comfortable and welcoming. I can spend a few minutes wiping down the wall near the stove that needs freshening and removing the kitty nose prints from the most obvious spots. It's not worth the stress of trying to be perfect for people who already know I'm not! They are coming to visit us, not my house. As long as the bathroom is clean and we have food to eat, a little clutter in other rooms is easily forgotten!
As I write about the "Martha" preparations (I would have probably been in the kitchen with her), I pause to reflect on the "Mary" preparations--she who had the best part. I mentioned that I get a little nutty when I'm hosting events. So, what should I do when that anxious, nutty feeling tugs at my mind and heart? Pray, of course. What for? God's will, of course. How will I know what that is? By listening with my heart.
I still need to do things to get ready, but the approach should be pure joy. I don't "have to make cookies." I'm baking because we will be celebrating this weekend--my son will be Confirmed and we'll have a mini family reunion! We will be part of a larger gathering of friends whose children are also being Confirmed. We are gathering in love and prayer to celebrate the gifts of the Holy Spirit and His Grace in our children's lives. Therefore, the work of my hands will be a joy. The focus for my tasks must be the why and the who--not the quantity of tasks checked off my list. If I approach the next few days with love, asking God to help me use the Gifts of the Holy Spirit that I received at my own Confirmation, then the things that really need doing will get done.
Most importantly, reevaluating my expectations to reflect God's will in my life instead of fostering my pride will help my whole family "to choose the best part."
In the past few weeks, my housekeeping has been inadequate, my meal prep has been icky, and my temper...okay, this blog isn't the confessional. However, I have realized in the past few days (partly because I received the graces of the Sacrament of Reconciliation) that the expectations I have for what I can accomplish on any given day are generally unrealistic. Also, they tend to be me-driven instead of God-driven. I made a giant list on the white board this morning and assigned tasks to certain days as I prepare for my family to come visit for my eldest child's Confirmation this Saturday. The list may be a bit too ambitious, but at least I don't expect to do everything in one day.
Usually, when company is coming, I lose my mind a little bit, in the whole "SHE Perfectionism" that FlyLady talks about so often. I know, we're not supposed to use the "P" word. I want the house to look nice. I want the food to taste great. I want. I want. I want.
Some of the things I want are reasonable and good things to do in preparation for company. Others are over-the-top. Do I really need to scrub the kitchen walls and all the windows in the house this week? I'm not on vacation from work or homeschooling, so I would be taking time from my responsibilities to look good in the eyes of others. Pride.
Maybe instead of trying to make everything magazine perfect, I can make it comfortable and welcoming. I can spend a few minutes wiping down the wall near the stove that needs freshening and removing the kitty nose prints from the most obvious spots. It's not worth the stress of trying to be perfect for people who already know I'm not! They are coming to visit us, not my house. As long as the bathroom is clean and we have food to eat, a little clutter in other rooms is easily forgotten!
As I write about the "Martha" preparations (I would have probably been in the kitchen with her), I pause to reflect on the "Mary" preparations--she who had the best part. I mentioned that I get a little nutty when I'm hosting events. So, what should I do when that anxious, nutty feeling tugs at my mind and heart? Pray, of course. What for? God's will, of course. How will I know what that is? By listening with my heart.
I still need to do things to get ready, but the approach should be pure joy. I don't "have to make cookies." I'm baking because we will be celebrating this weekend--my son will be Confirmed and we'll have a mini family reunion! We will be part of a larger gathering of friends whose children are also being Confirmed. We are gathering in love and prayer to celebrate the gifts of the Holy Spirit and His Grace in our children's lives. Therefore, the work of my hands will be a joy. The focus for my tasks must be the why and the who--not the quantity of tasks checked off my list. If I approach the next few days with love, asking God to help me use the Gifts of the Holy Spirit that I received at my own Confirmation, then the things that really need doing will get done.
Most importantly, reevaluating my expectations to reflect God's will in my life instead of fostering my pride will help my whole family "to choose the best part."
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Transitus
Today is October 3--my mother-in-law's birthday, my son Brian's half-birthday, the Transitus of St. Francis of Assisi, and a Wednesday. It's a day like any other day, where lots of people need prayer. Two families I know had "quiet" struggles this week (not many were aware of their hardships), and I wanted to take away their troubles. Of course, I don't have that sort of power, so I did the next best thing, I prayed, hard. And, I asked my children to pray, too. I know some people don't believe in the power of prayer, but I've felt and seen prayer at work in my life and the lives of those around me.
We are parishioners at a Franciscan parish, and my husband and I studied and were professed in the Secular Franciscan Order early in our marriage. We moved a few times since the profession and haven't been active in a local fraternity, but I still feel the call of the Franciscan charism in my life--a call to prayer, love, and simplicity.
October is a month we remember to respect life. Both of the families who are struggling recognize the value of life. On this Transitus, I pray that St. Francis asks God's blessing on my friends as they transition into the next phase of their family life, which will undoubtedly be much different next week than it was at the end of September.
The children and I were able to go and be of service for one of the families this morning. Somehow housework at someone else's house seems so much easier and more fulfilling than it does at home.... One of the joys of homeschooling is the license to drop everything and be of service to those who need it when they need it. I hope my children learn the "perfect joy" of helping others through our "at your service" days. Just as the students at traditional schools have a break from academics on teacher in-service days, we had a break from academics this morning. Though we weren't reading and writing, much learning was happening. We learned about organizing, about making room for others in our homes and hearts, and about getting things done peacefully and lovingly. The older children took turns minding the toddler while the moms did big work. Other older kids sorted, organized, and tidied a room to make space for another bed. In the middle of our work, we took a break and shared a meal. Sitting at the table together with our friends, just as we do with our family, gave us an opportunity to hear one another, especially the child who is struggling the most with the transition. He had a place to share his frustrations, but he still smiled and laughed. I'd call it a good day!
I pray for all who may happen upon my little blog. May God continue to bless you and your family in whatever hidden struggles you may face. May he hold you in the palm of his hand and give you his peace. Amen.
We are parishioners at a Franciscan parish, and my husband and I studied and were professed in the Secular Franciscan Order early in our marriage. We moved a few times since the profession and haven't been active in a local fraternity, but I still feel the call of the Franciscan charism in my life--a call to prayer, love, and simplicity.
October is a month we remember to respect life. Both of the families who are struggling recognize the value of life. On this Transitus, I pray that St. Francis asks God's blessing on my friends as they transition into the next phase of their family life, which will undoubtedly be much different next week than it was at the end of September.
The children and I were able to go and be of service for one of the families this morning. Somehow housework at someone else's house seems so much easier and more fulfilling than it does at home.... One of the joys of homeschooling is the license to drop everything and be of service to those who need it when they need it. I hope my children learn the "perfect joy" of helping others through our "at your service" days. Just as the students at traditional schools have a break from academics on teacher in-service days, we had a break from academics this morning. Though we weren't reading and writing, much learning was happening. We learned about organizing, about making room for others in our homes and hearts, and about getting things done peacefully and lovingly. The older children took turns minding the toddler while the moms did big work. Other older kids sorted, organized, and tidied a room to make space for another bed. In the middle of our work, we took a break and shared a meal. Sitting at the table together with our friends, just as we do with our family, gave us an opportunity to hear one another, especially the child who is struggling the most with the transition. He had a place to share his frustrations, but he still smiled and laughed. I'd call it a good day!
I pray for all who may happen upon my little blog. May God continue to bless you and your family in whatever hidden struggles you may face. May he hold you in the palm of his hand and give you his peace. Amen.
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