My adult life has included a variety of weather already. I just noticed that tomorrow marks 20 years since I earned my bachelor's degree. It seems like just a few years ago I was a young, single recent college grad at her first full-time job, then a young wife and mother. Where did the time go? Now I'm the mother of four children ranging in age from 7 to almost 16 years old. The season of mothering teens is much different than mothering infants and toddlers.
I spent this afternoon with my daughter at a mini orientation for "out of district" children who will be attending the rather large (2000+ students) public high school this fall. The group of about 20 eighth graders included children from parochial and charter schools as well as homeschoolers (not sure if we were the only ones in that category). The guidance counselors and principal gave us information about academics, clubs, and more. The students took a language arts placement test while the parents went to another room with the counselors. The counselors spoke about a variety of services and topics, including academic ineligibility for sports and summer school for those who fail classes. This concept is somewhat foreign to me. As an educator, I know that not everyone passes every course. However, I wondered just how may kids have to take summer school classes--how many students fail one or more classes or have a GPA too low to participate in sports.
The counselors spoke about cyber bullying and emotional issues with which guidance can help. They spoke highly of the principal and his zero tolerance for bullying, violence, or gang activity at the school. They recognized that the school is not perfect--it's populated with human teenagers after all--but they gave me a sense that their priority is the success of every student who walks through their doors. Their enthusiasm (in March, no less!) gave me the sense that they are dedicated to their work and that my daughter will be in the right place next fall to help her achieve her goals for high school.
The thing I liked most about this meeting was the guidance counselors' emphasis on the role of the parent in the child's success. They encouraged all of the parents to contact the school whenever we had a concern. One of my hesitations about public education was the idea that I was "giving my kids to the system." I did not get that sense from the staff at the high school. I see them as partners in the next season of my parenting journey--letting my only daughter venture into the big world of high school and not holding her hand. Yes, my heart will be with her, and I'm likely to cry when she heads to the corner to catch the bus in August. But, my children will tell you, everything makes me cry--mostly the good stuff! I'll also cry when she runs her first high school cross country meet, when she brings home an art project, or when she acts in a play. My happiest seasons are notoriously "rainy."
Honestly, I'm pretty confident in my daughter's ability to avoid trouble, succeed academically, and to adjust to this big change next fall. I'm excited to see how much she will grow and change from a girl into a young woman over the next four years.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NAB)
*There is an appointed time for everything,
and a time for every affair under the heavens.
A time to give birth, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to uproot the plant.
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to tear down, and a time to build.
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them;
a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces.
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away.
A time to rend, and a time to sew;a time to be silent, and a time to speak.
A time to love, and a time to hate;
a time of war, and a time of peace.
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